There was a very distinct moment in the midst of the accident where I felt myself lose control of the car altogether. But something…Someone…else took over. I was calling out His name more fiercely than I ever have before. And in the span of those terrifying seconds where my car nearly rolled and finally stopped after colliding a second time with a concrete barrier, I felt Him closer to me than I ever have.
He was pervasively, intensely, powerfully, beautifully close to me.
The aftermath of the crash was a strange mixture of joy at being alive and relatively unscathed and fearful realizations of just how serious the whole thing was. I spent the rest of the day in the incredibly good hands (and arms) of dearly loved ones. I am convinced that they would have conquered the universe for me, if necessary. We all shared in amazement that I walked away from a car accident that likely should have ended much, much worse.
I woke up the next morning in my own bed, keenly aware of the rest and safety that enveloped me. I erased my white board that normally contains my to-do list and a million other things and wrote the words “just breathe” in big, bold letters. Those words have not left the board since.
I am constantly taken aback at overwhelming sense of safety that comes only with knowing I am in the palm of His hands. A few days later, I wept as the tightly wound ball of fear inside my chest began to unwind even more. Waves of gratitude steadily washed away the residual effects of the accident and even the things leading up to it.
Sitting here in my quiet and cozy room with candles lit, I find myself again cherishing the life in my body and the breath in my lungs. Not even a week after the accident has happened, I feel more whole than even. Perfectly at peace. Nothing missing. Nothing broken. His restoration is so evident. After all is said and done, He has worked this entire situation (even the smallest nuance of it) for the incredible good of this heart that is so in love with Him.
It is in this that I am truly at a loss for words.











